Thursday, March 23, 2006
The local phone company where I get my internet access also offers TV. They have a lot of channels and give a good discount for using their phone service, internet service, and TV together as a package. There is one channel that I currently receive from my satellite dish that the phone company does not offer. I have been told that since Jesus is in their system then their is no room for Cinemax or as I lovingly refer to it; Skinamax.
I do not fault them for this decision. If they do not want to offer a particular channel for whatever reason then they should have the right not to. Other cable operators and satellite services are there to take up the slack in a free market economy. Just do not expect me to buy it. It is not often that I watch soft core porn on Skinamax but it is comforting to me to know that anytime I do want to watch it then it is no more than a click away on my remote control.
Here are three things that make Skinamax movies worth watching.
3) The cheesy soundtracks. Where do they find the people who write the songs that are a perfect accompaniment to simulated sex acts. Maybe they have special courses in music schools teaching the ins and outs of this unique art form.
2) Sometimes a person just wants to watch mindless entertainment with lots of gratuitous nudity. Sometimes I really don't want to watch the next coming of 'Citizen Kane'. My mind is frequently numbed to the point that I don't want to think about anything. When that happens it is nice to know that 'The Bikini Carwash Company' is there to the rescue.
1) Are they real or are they fake? I like to play a little game while watching Skinamax movies. When I first see the actresses clothed, I like to guess if their breasts are natural or if they are augmented. I am right a good deal of the time but there are always those times that surprise me and I love a good surprise.
I sincerely hope that the phone company has room for both Jesus and me on the internet or I will be in trouble.