Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Salad Tossers


The rise of morbid obesity in children is no secret and a cause for concern but just like everything else that they get their mitts on the army of politically correct dumbasses are taking extreme measures to make the world a bland and tasteless place.

Their target in this war on fat kids is none other than that beloved glutton, Cookie Monster. And Sesame Street caved in to their demands like a thirty year old cesspool. First, Cookie Monster sang of cookies being a sometimes food and now on the Sesame Street website they have a game where the Big Blue Eating Machine tosses a salad.

The morons of political correctness know no boundarys and have now turned a lovable icon into just another salad tosser. How sad! I refuse to link this game as it is a complete travesty and affront to the dignity of a once proud Cookie Monster. I have but one thing to say to these political correctoids, "Toss My Salad!!!"

46 comments:

tubawench said...

Yes, let's target something that is easy to change, but won't make a bit of friggin' difference. I watched Sesame Street in my formative years, and Cookie Monster was a favorite of mine. I still managed to grow tall and slim. It's up to parents to teach their children. Unfortunately too many have abdicated their responsibility and want someone else to "fix" the problem.

"C is for Cookie, it's good enough for me." Long live Cookie Monster.

Ranea said...

Before you know it these dumbasses will want Oscar the Grouch to move out of his trash can! Because it could be offensive to homeless people. WTF!

Big D said...

C IS FOR COOKIE!!!!

Metal Mark said...

I am a huge fan of Sesame Street and watch it with my kids a lot. I do think this move is a little odd, but I still think the show does a lot of good for kids.At least Oscar is still allows to say scram and be as grouchy as ever.

Curare_Z said...

Just beware what you ask for Fuzz -- some of those people may just offer to toss your salad. Then you'll have to be prepared to answer the age old question, "How do you like your salad tossed, with jelly or syrup?" ;-)

Vic said...

Grover was always my favorite anyway!

starbender said...

I am Upauled!!! What has happened 2 R Country? How can the Cookie Monster toss salad?
....hmmmm.....,
I guess If Yale University can take in a known AlQuida member with a 4th. grade education--
ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

Are there any flights leaving for the MOON? This Country has become unglued, and I 4 one am Mad As Hell!

Thanx 4 letting me Explode that!
:""(

ozymandiaz said...

How about a song telling parents to stop feeding their kids tons of shit and letting them sit on the couch all day... oh, wait, that would mean personal responsability...
oh...I feel a poem comming on...

Bruce said...

Screw the PC cops. Everything is blamed on TV, movies, video games, yada, yada, yada...
It's time for parents to step up and show their children the right way.

Curare- the first time I heard that "tossed salad" remark was on Don and Mike several years ago. It still cracks me up...

Perplexio said...

It's times like this when the world needs a hero... times like this where the world needs SUPERGROVER!

Yes, only SuperGrover can truly save us from our own political correctness.

Mimi said...

I was pissed when I heard about this one. People should be protesting this rather than the stupid crap they do. Like using the world "holiday" instead of "Christmas".

Big D said it, C is for Cookie! He is the Cookie Monster for crying out loud. Not the Veggie Monster!Kids are not dumb, they ain't gonna fall for it either.

michael said...

What's next?
Tofumonster?
Good God.
How about educating the parents on the idea of decent nutrition?
Sheesh...

~m

Sherri said...

Salad?? Good grief!! What's this world coming to?!

the weirdgirl said...

No, up next is... Cookie Monster's fight with bulemia, an afternoon special. Tossing his cookies or tossing salad, Cookie Monster learns when thin is too thin.

At least, the Cookie Monster change is only on the website and not across the board. Man, now I need to go eat a cookie.

Curare_Z said...

I heard it from Chris Rock. He's talking about how much prison would suck and ends that portion of the skit with the punchline: "How do you like your salad tossed, with jelly or syrup? I prefer syrup."

I laughed so hard I almost pee'd my pants.

Green Eyes said...

Ranea brings up a good point!

I guess I should take care of my Cookie Monster doll that laughs and talks about cookies. He's going to make me some big bucks later!

It's a wonder I turned out so well, with all the "bad" stuff that surrounded me!

siren said...

I second Big D - C is for cookie, that's good enough for me :)

Laurie said...

The salad monster???

I totally agree with what Oz said.

phred said...

C is for Cookie !!!

:P fuzzbox said...

tubawench: That is the problem with political correctness. It never goes to the heart of the problem only the peripheral b.s. that amounts to nothing.

ranea: WTF indeed.

big d: Well spoken!

metal mark: At least for now.

:P fuzzbox said...

curare: As long as it's not strawberry jelly. Those little seeds are a bitch.

vic: Grover is metrosexual you know. The weirdgirl told me so.

starbender: Anytime. And BTW you are absolutely right.

ozy: Rhyme away.

:P fuzzbox said...

bruce: Ain't that the truth.

perplexio: Maybe the Ambiguously Gay Duo could help.

mimi: You are right. Kids will know the difference. A carrot just can't be the same as a cookie.

michael: That would make sense. Which is exactly why the politically correct crowd would never go for it.

:P fuzzbox said...

sherri: Hell in a handbasket. That's my guess.

weirdgirl: I could go for a chocolate chip myself.

curare: I always liked the Martin Lawrence bit about if I was thrown in prison I would have the nastiest ass in the whole place and would never wipe or wash my ass. People would stay away from my shit.

green eyes: It damn sure might be worth some big bucks.

:P fuzzbox said...

siren: C is for Cookie and BS is for well we all know what BS is for. These people are full of that.

laurie: It just doesn't have the same ring to it does it.

phred: And you don't need dressing for that.

guerrilla blogger said...

i hate "the people in charge"...i have so much to say on this topic, i won't say it here, my comment would be longer than your post, and i am too stooooopid to condense it into a witty mark twain one liner....

guerrilla blogger said...

oh, and tubawench took the "C is for COOKIE and that is good enough for me, dammit" line....

siren said...

Fuzz - funny you mention "BS". Unfortunately, it's also my initials ;)

Jim said...

diabetes is a dream come true for the drug companies,just look behind the counter at any pharmacy!!!! from 1980 through 2004, the number of Americans with diabetes more than doubled (from 5.8 million to 14.7 million). I don't know about cookies, but 2 12 oz sodas per day is the same as 1 1/2 pounds of sugar per week! come on folks, we're talking about children -- cliches are fun to rant about, but we want kids to have long, healthy lives and not be blind before they have grandkids of their own

:P fuzzbox said...

gb: She thought of that one quick. And I am to dim to think of long rants on most any subject. That is why I try to rely on one liners.

siren: I didn't think of that. Did you catch any hell in school over that? Kid's can be a pain in the arse when they figure that stuff out.

jim: You are correct but I also think that the problem cannot be fixed by railing against puppets. It can only be fixed by getting to the root of the problem; those feeding the kids.

Johnny Wadd said...

Let's direct the blame anywhere but ourselves.

Keshi said...

sounds very similar to something that happened recently in Aus....they changed the words in Ba Ba 'Black' Sheep cos the word 'black' was supposedly racist...can u just believe that!


Keshi.

Jim said...

anyone interested in the problem might want to watch "Jamie's School Lunch Project" on The Learning Channel -- what an eye opener about what school kids eat and the problems that the schools have, especially their inability to prepare healthy food that tastes good or that kids will want -- it's a touchy subject with me because we had neighbors for about 10 years whom everyone came to call "the fat people" -- their 5 year old was so big when they moved in that I thought he was 10 or 11 -- he would get off the school bus at the end of the street everyday, pop open a soda and drink it on the way to his house, his house was not far, he was just that slow -- they had pizza delivered almost every night -- the mother, twice the size of Roseanne, taught grade school!

on the other hand, I do agree with the silliness of the salad maker -- why not have the Cookie Monster eat healthy cookies, that would seem more useful than trying to get kids to eat salad.

the word verification is bushnh, which I'll take as a White House endorsement :)

Catch said...

Its just like all the other bullshit in this country..I just dont understand why we let them get away with it.

michaelm said...

Fuzz-

Maybe "C" will now stand for crouton...

~m

:P fuzzbox said...

jim: Texas had a law rolled out a few years ago that banned junk food and sodas in vending machines. Now they sell healthy snacks and juice and diet drinks. It's a step.

catch: The squeeky wheel gets the grease. They squeek louder I suppose.

michael: Good One.

Perplexio said...

Keshi: Black is a color, it has been long before it was ever a racist term... Do the PC powers that be down under not realize that?

What are the words now, "Ba ba charcoal sheep?" "Ba ba dark sheep?"

For some reason all this talk of being PC reminds me of the Emo Phillips joke:

"You know what I hate? Indian givers... wait, no, I take that back."

phlegmfatale said...

No doubt these asstards would be happy to clean your kitchen, honey.

The Phoenix said...

I'm all for healthier lunches in school. Having been a teacher, I couldn't believe the crap kids ate on a daily basis. Type II diabetes, here they come!

What's next? Are they going to kill off the owl that helps the kid figure out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?

:P fuzzbox said...

phlegmmy: At least they could be of some use.

phoenix: The owl is probably licked.

:P fuzzbox said...

perplexio: I haven't heard Emo quoted in awhile. Cool.

Keshi said...

**Black is a color, it has been long before it was ever a racist term

totally agree Fuzzy!

But there r some stupid ppl who dun get that...

Now it's something like 'Baa Baa Rainbow Sheep'...and it doesnt even rhyme!


Keshi.

Keshi said...

btw this was only in some primary schools in QLD.

Keshi.

:P fuzzbox said...

Rainbow Sheep? That must be some strange looking creature.

Jim said...

their wool could be used to make argyle socks

Perplexio said...

fuzzbox: Rainbow sheep are indigineous to San Francisco, CA; Provincetown, MA; Saugatuck, MI; and Sydney, Australia to name a few places...

And while I've never eaten it, I've heard that rainbow lamb is absolutely FABULOUS!

:P fuzzbox said...

jim: That would be too cool.

perplexio: That is where Merle Haggard came up with the meat for his song, 'Rainbow Stew.' Cool.