My son's fifth grade teacher contacted me and asked if I would help chaperone the classes field trip to Caprock Canyon State Park to witness the scores of bats fly out of an old railway tunnel that they call home. Like a boneheaded pushover, I agreed to help keep an eye on the group of fourth, fifth, and sixth graders.
So in a couple of weeks, I will be departing by school bus at 8:00 a.m. and traveling for over two hours. I plan on sitting at the back of the bus. I need to collect some straws and some paper. I would love to relive the days of my youth sitting at the back of the bus coating the drivers rearview mirror in spitwads.
Who knows, I might even enjoy myself at the park in spite of being surrounded by little demons. There is guided nature hikes and the park is the home of the Official Buffalo Herd started by Charles Goodknight. The hike to the tunnel, where the bats will fly out of at night, is two miles. Hopefully I won't have to cart out any of the munchkins, that are more use to the couch than the great outdoors. In fact, I wonder how it would go over if I rig up a chair on poles and have a horde of the spawn carry me to and from the tunnel, like a conquering Roman upon his litter.
The itinerary lists us as returning home about midnight. I think that I should pack some liquor and playing cards and teach the kids the intricacies of the game of poker for the long ride home. If I am going to be a chaperone then I should get a little bit back out of the ordeal.
I will update this post as the event draws closer and hopefully post a few pics after the adventure. Hell, this might even become a side-gig. My business card could read:
:P Fuzzbox - Chaperone For Hire: " Your personal Uncle Buck for the New Millinium "