My step-daughter needed to type out a homework assignment for band class and my printer is on the fritz, so I called up my brother, Crazy Dan to see if she could type it up on his computer. He said that it would be fine and to send her over. I had some reservations on how the paper would turn out as my step-daughter;as documented earlier in this blog, is an insufferable smart-ass and Crazy Dan; well if you aren't familiar with Crazy Dan just go over to the links page and pop over to his blog 'Accidental Goat Sodomy' and give it a read. I figured if she needed any help at least the paper would be good for a few laughs.
When I returned from work the next day, I was not disappointed. After a few chuckles, I called her into the living room and pointed out a few sentences that might need a little editing and asked her how much help Crazy Dan had given her. She said that her two pages of handwritten material had shrunk to about a quarter of a page when typed out and Crazy Dan had only suggested certain areas to expand upon and did not actually coin any of her phrases.
Her assignment was on Respect and was handed out by her band teacher to the class due to their lack of this commidity. I will now quote a few lines which I suggested she might edit.
1) 'All those people that quit band and are in the Music History Class with Mr. Shipley are all gay. They are quitters and losers.' I told her that it is not correct to offer up such broad generalizations as they might not be all gay but only partially so and while the band instructor might agree with this statement, I doubt that she would like to see it on the paper.
2) ' It is our duty to keep the band hall clean. But everyone knows most of the mess comes from the trumpet and percussion sections. They are just nasty.' While this statement might be correct it is never the less devisive and might make her even more enemies in these sections.
On a better note, I believe a couple of her phrases were catchy. Her quote of, 'Band Geeks Rock', might earn her points from the head band geek and her quote of, 'If we come to class with Band Spirit, everything will come out alright.', I believe showed some ingenuity.
On her closing statement, I hope that she does not have to read the selection aloud for I do not believe that she is a good enough actress to pull it off with a straight face. 'See look at me. I do nothing wrong. Here I am standing up straight with my flute level.' And then her pic from a halftime show. That is her on the left.
Maybe they will let her tutor visit her in the dungeon where they hold in school suspension if she doesn't take my advice and edit it before turning the paper in.