Wednesday, November 02, 2005



Twisted Vocabulary

While doing the usual blog surfing, I came across the latest post of Dear Jane. She posted about the Washington Post Mensa Invitational, a contest where you had to alter a word by changing, adding or subtracting one letter, and then give a definition of the new word. Although the examples of their work was good, I couldn't help but think that these eggheads just were not down with the sickness. Here is my twisted spin on a few words.

Auwhority - An expert in prostitution.

Egopistic - The pride in writing one's name in the snow.

Insomenia - A sleep disorder akin to sleep walking but it is sleep phucking. A man wakes up and he is in some.

Misterbate - When during the act of self-gratification, the man loses track of where the semen went, as illustrated in 'Something About Mary'.

Miscalcumate - An error in judgement when using the rhythm method.

Premanstrual syndrome - The protective reflex of a male when his mate is suffering from premenstrual syndrome.

Priccalo - A musical dildo that whistles while it works.

Pulemia - The compulsion to masterbate after eating a meal.

Returded - When the shit hits the fan and flings back in your face.

Transfuguration - The hideous metamorphysis that occurs, when after drinking heavily in a bar, one goes to bed with someone of beauty and wakes up with someone who is fugly.

Feel free to share your own twisted words. Remember vocabulary is a living breathing thing who knows one of your words may be the new shizzle. If Snoop can do it, why not you?

22 comments:

MrV said...

My compulsion is to masterbate during every meal I call it gorging.... "use you imagination"

:P fuzzbox said...

Hope you can keep the hair out of your soup.

Dear Jane... said...

fuxx, I am a sick sick girl in this happy world and this is hilarious. I wish I had thought of it first, though. I guess you are a bit more perverted than I...well done, sir!

:P fuzzbox said...

Thanks a lot dear jane. Actually two of the words come from my wife. I will leave it for people to guess which two are hers.

Dear Jane... said...

Angry Joyce - miscalmumate & Premanstrual? I left another comment on your last post as well. And let me know when you are done with those polaroids, ok?

:P fuzzbox said...

dear jane: premanstrual was Angry Joyce's but miscalcumate is pure fuzzbox.

laurie: I'm sure you'll come up with one. I had another one that my wife didn't like. Sarcoughapus - The mummified vagina of an ancient Egyption.

Crazy Dan said...

opporPunity - a chance at hitting some puss.

sMallow - to cause cum from a small dick to pass through the mouth and throat and into the stomach

exCunge - bodily fluids being expelled out of the vagina

Muffet - An establishment at which guests serve themsleves various types of puss.

:P fuzzbox said...

CD: Way to give it the old goat fucker try.
Heres another one: Captration - The act of castrating someone by busting a cap in their nutsack.

Crazy Dan said...

melanchoDy - upset because no one will play with your chode.

Dear Jane... said...

PoRntificate - the ability to drone on and on about the wonders of pornography

Dear Jane... said...

CD, i like muffet...phunny.

:P fuzzbox said...

A couple more:
sellatio - Oral sex from a door to door salesman.
cunnilingur - Oral sex that takes a long long time.

Dear Jane... said...

:P I think those two are my favorite.

Next you should do a post about adding a letter or two to word verification letters to make perverted words.

Best wishes for a sick, sick Friday...

Big D said...

Carnnibal - The act of carnies eating each other.

:P fuzzbox said...

dear jane: Some of the word verifacation letters are damn close to being perverted without much help at all. That's a good idea.

laurie: I thought you said you couldn't think of one. I saw on a comment of yours yesterday where you mentioned moobs for man boobs. I had never heard that term. Now that is phunny.

:P fuzzbox said...

Thanks for the word big d.

Dear Jane... said...

moobs...like the Manziere from Seinfeld.

:P fuzzbox said...

I always preferred the term, The Bro over Manziere.

Dear Jane... said...

Fuxx, are you trying to go tit for tat with me?

:P fuzzbox said...

I wouldn't do that. It's not like either one of us has to have the last word or anything.

Phred said...

Flopless dancer ... dancer that is not so well endowed.

:P fuzzbox said...

Phred: Eventhough technically you changed two letters. I still loved your response and award you the coveted Twisted Mensan Award. This entitles you to one free call to Phone-A-Friend. Details in the next post.