Wednesday, November 02, 2005



Twisted Vocabulary

While doing the usual blog surfing, I came across the latest post of Dear Jane. She posted about the Washington Post Mensa Invitational, a contest where you had to alter a word by changing, adding or subtracting one letter, and then give a definition of the new word. Although the examples of their work was good, I couldn't help but think that these eggheads just were not down with the sickness. Here is my twisted spin on a few words.

Auwhority - An expert in prostitution.

Egopistic - The pride in writing one's name in the snow.

Insomenia - A sleep disorder akin to sleep walking but it is sleep phucking. A man wakes up and he is in some.

Misterbate - When during the act of self-gratification, the man loses track of where the semen went, as illustrated in 'Something About Mary'.

Miscalcumate - An error in judgement when using the rhythm method.

Premanstrual syndrome - The protective reflex of a male when his mate is suffering from premenstrual syndrome.

Priccalo - A musical dildo that whistles while it works.

Pulemia - The compulsion to masterbate after eating a meal.

Returded - When the shit hits the fan and flings back in your face.

Transfuguration - The hideous metamorphysis that occurs, when after drinking heavily in a bar, one goes to bed with someone of beauty and wakes up with someone who is fugly.

Feel free to share your own twisted words. Remember vocabulary is a living breathing thing who knows one of your words may be the new shizzle. If Snoop can do it, why not you?

24 comments:

MrV said...

My compulsion is to masterbate during every meal I call it gorging.... "use you imagination"

:P fuzzbox said...

Hope you can keep the hair out of your soup.

Reiki said...

fuxx, I am a sick sick girl in this happy world and this is hilarious. I wish I had thought of it first, though. I guess you are a bit more perverted than I...well done, sir!

:P fuzzbox said...

Thanks a lot dear jane. Actually two of the words come from my wife. I will leave it for people to guess which two are hers.

Reiki said...

Angry Joyce - miscalmumate & Premanstrual? I left another comment on your last post as well. And let me know when you are done with those polaroids, ok?

Laurie said...

dang, you're good at that. I've been wracking my brain all day to even come up with one measley word... I'm not giving up, though.

:P fuzzbox said...

dear jane: premanstrual was Angry Joyce's but miscalcumate is pure fuzzbox.

laurie: I'm sure you'll come up with one. I had another one that my wife didn't like. Sarcoughapus - The mummified vagina of an ancient Egyption.

Crazy Dan said...

opporPunity - a chance at hitting some puss.

sMallow - to cause cum from a small dick to pass through the mouth and throat and into the stomach

exCunge - bodily fluids being expelled out of the vagina

Muffet - An establishment at which guests serve themsleves various types of puss.

:P fuzzbox said...

CD: Way to give it the old goat fucker try.
Heres another one: Captration - The act of castrating someone by busting a cap in their nutsack.

Crazy Dan said...

melanchoDy - upset because no one will play with your chode.

Reiki said...

PoRntificate - the ability to drone on and on about the wonders of pornography

Reiki said...

CD, i like muffet...phunny.

:P fuzzbox said...

A couple more:
sellatio - Oral sex from a door to door salesman.
cunnilingur - Oral sex that takes a long long time.

Reiki said...

:P I think those two are my favorite.

Next you should do a post about adding a letter or two to word verification letters to make perverted words.

Best wishes for a sick, sick Friday...

Laurie said...

dude, you are on a roll!

you're so good at this, I'm almost worried.. ;-)

Big D said...

Carnnibal - The act of carnies eating each other.

:P fuzzbox said...

dear jane: Some of the word verifacation letters are damn close to being perverted without much help at all. That's a good idea.

laurie: I thought you said you couldn't think of one. I saw on a comment of yours yesterday where you mentioned moobs for man boobs. I had never heard that term. Now that is phunny.

:P fuzzbox said...

Thanks for the word big d.

Reiki said...

moobs...like the Manziere from Seinfeld.

:P fuzzbox said...

I always preferred the term, The Bro over Manziere.

Reiki said...

Fuxx, are you trying to go tit for tat with me?

:P fuzzbox said...

I wouldn't do that. It's not like either one of us has to have the last word or anything.

phred said...

Flopless dancer ... dancer that is not so well endowed.

:P fuzzbox said...

Phred: Eventhough technically you changed two letters. I still loved your response and award you the coveted Twisted Mensan Award. This entitles you to one free call to Phone-A-Friend. Details in the next post.