Random Acts of Stupidity
I would wager that not a day goes by that I do not hear someone tell a story that begins, "Let me tell you what that stupid sumbitch did." I do not know why I like to hear stories of the ineptness of others since on the occasions when I am actually a witness to stupidity, it bugs the piss out of me. But I thought that I would share a few today that I have picked up at work.
In the breakroom at work, one employee related the story of picking up a cheeseburger at a local restaurant where he had asked them to cut the onions. They did. They cut them into little tiny pieces and smothered his burger in them.
A coworker and myself were discussing the dumb things that another coworker had done. He told me that he had worked with this individual previously on a roofing project. He was holding a chalkline on one edge of the roof and had asked the bonehead to go to the other edge of the roof with the other end so they could pop the chalkline to get a straight edge. While the bonehead was walking off, his attention was diverted and was looking down getting his tools in order. That is when twenty feet of chalkline zipped by. Yes you got it right this bonehead got to the edge and kept on walking.
Now for an oldie but a goodie. Back when I was still on the floor and holding the position of lead operator, which is kind of like a straw boss when the supervisor is busy holding court in the breakroom, an end of a dropcord of an electrical line was pulled off while moving some equipment. My supervisor, who was also the safety coordinator of the plant at the time, repaired the end by placing a male end on the end of the dropcord rather than the female end so the end of the dropcord was hot with 240 volts coming straight out of the end. I told him to take that off and I would go get a female end to plug in so that no one would get shocked, but as he did not want to appear that he had made a stupid mistake, he said it was fine as it was. I shrugged but did not push it. I warned the other crew and went about my business. A week later, while moving the equipment hooked to this plug, my supervisor (you guessed it) took the full force of the 240 straight through the noggin. Immediately after seeing that he was not dead, I laughed my ass off. And the laughs kept coming all night as about every 45 minutes he would shake like a dog shitting a peach seed with the effect of the electricity.
If I ever follow up on this post, I will add other stories of my ex-supervisor regarding forklift rodeo, dangling into the grinder pit, and how to land a cushy job and lose it in three months.