OPERATION PANTY PURIFICATION
This past week in McLean, Va. , thirty woman picketed their local mall in outrage over the window display at it's Victoria's Secret outlet with allegations that it was promoting lesbianism and sadomasochism. Even when the store display was toned down by removing the ropes from one mannequin, the women were concerned that it was still leaned against the pole with it's arms over it's head. Even when the display removed one of the mannequins that was lying in a bed spooning with another mannequin, they were still concerned. Even when one mannequin that was on hands and knees crawling towards another mannequin was removed, they were still concerned. And the picketing and threats of boycotting the new mall continued and will continue until the racy lingerie store is gone. Or so they now insist.
They could possibly be right maybe sexy ladies undergarments have no place in an outlet mall tucked between KayBee's Toys and the Great American Cookie Factory. Perhaps one wave of the future will be Adult Outlet Malls of America. Victoria's Secret will be right at home tucked between CayGees Sex Toys and The Great American Nookie Factory.
But why stop there, what about the department stores like Sear's, J.C. Penny's, and Mervyn's. Don't they show off lingerie and undergarments right on manniquin's, and on the shelves, and right on the racks, and for that matter don't the discount stores such as Wal-Mart and K-Mart have their items right in plain view. Since these stores probably have the right to sell these items, why not package them in brown paper bags and give a short description of their size, style, and color. Something along the lines of either, Size 5, black, thong or Size 18, pink, granny panty.
Maybe these picketers need to just get a life and get over it. The ogling of ladies undergarments has been an American tradition since it's inception. In day's past before Playboy or indoor plumbing or modern toilet paper, the last pages ever ripped from the Sear's and Roebuck's catalogue in the outhouse was the section selling ladies undergarments. So to these picketers, I have to say, "Don't get your panties in a knot."