The judges are hopelessly deadlocked on the shit talking contest with three different choices. So the tie-breaker is up to you, here are your three finalists. And thanks to all who entered by leaving a comment or by e-mail. Remember there are no losers here. Well maybe me but that doesn't count.
Old Fart's Wife
Ice Cream:All I want to know is what the hell happened to Mr. Softy?? This custard crap is NOT ice cream. The freezer burn shit on a stick that the din-a-ling guy brings around sucks.Why do all those guys look like child molesters! FOAD to the ding-a-ling guy!!
Baby kitties: What is it with humans who treat their animals like children? People dress their baby kitties in cutesy clothes and then want me to kiss or pet the little fuckers. FOAD!!!! Fuck off and get the cat outta my face. If I want to kiss a pussy it will be a two legged one who can verbally thank me later.
Masturbation: What chaps my ass about masturbation is that some parents do not explain to their children that it is ok, and the kid goes through puberty or eternity-(ha-ha) feeling guilty about it. I think it is a parents duty to explain this to the kids (boys and girls and give a few pointers on getting the best they can out of it. Given the proper tools(similar to giving them a bicycle), I bet we would see more smiles, and less teen girls having babies. Maybe more girls would learn early on, that it is NOT better to give than to receive.FOAD to all the phuckers that say they would never do it, but lie about it!
Listen hear Fuzz you needle dick kitten raping cum guzzling queen if you don't start coming up with some original posts I am going to have you lick icecream out of my ass and punch you in the face while listening to Elvis's greatest hits CD.
Ice Cream - You know what's shitty about Ice Cream? When it give you the runs........if you're lactose intolerant that is. I didn't used to be, and I LOVE ice cream!! Especially chocolate with multi colored sprinkles. It make it kinda look like diarrea with little pieces of corn, carrots and other stuff that never did get digested in your stomach. I still eat it, but it make the who house stink when I let one rip. Thanks Mr Softy!!
Baby Kitties - They're so cute once they get to be about 4 weeks old. Until then, they just look like a little piece of thawed turd that has been hanging out of a bear's ass all winter. The fur is all wet and stuck to their bodies, and their eyes are like pieces of left over berrys.
Masterbation - The only time that masterbation is shitty is when you are constipated. You know you can't jerk off because you're all uncomfortable from the back up of nasty processed food pushing on your ball sack from inside your body. You're still all horney, so you force it and then right after you cum, you feel like someone just kicked you in the nuts.
Now a specal FOAD to Blogger. I have been unable to load a pic for this post all week and yesterday and this morning I have been unable to access any blog on blogspot until just now. So who knows if this will even publish.
For more FOAD posts click here and if you do a FOADT post remember to link back to that link and get yourself listed.