Tuesday, June 20, 2006

25 Things That I Have Learned From Country Music

Or Two Stepping My Way Through Life
Hank Williams Jr. taught me that a country boy can survive.
Johnny Cash taught me how to walk the line.
The Bellamy Brothers taught me about redneck girls. Their hands may be calloused but their hearts are tender.
Charlie Daniels taught me that if all else fails to reach out and kick old green teeth right in the knee.
Garth Brooks taught me that some of the greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.
Merle Haggard taught me that sometimes it's best to just find a bar stool and sit right there and drink.
Kenny Rogers taught me to beware of Ruby. She'll take her love to town.
Willie Nelson taught me that nothing is sadder than blue eyes crying in the rain.
Waylon Jennings taught me about good hearted women loving good timing men.
Johnny Paycheck taught me to be able to say take this job and shove it.
Jimmy Buffet taught me that no matter how many people may say that there is a woman to blame, it's my own damn fault.
Jerry Jeff Walker taught me of being 35 and drinkin' in a honky tonk.
Toby Keith taught me that sometimes it's okay to want to talk about me.
George Jones taught me the lesson of remembering things long and lean and built to handle.
Travis Tritt taught me that sometimes you can listen to no more. Just hand them a quarter and directions to call someone that cares.
Alabama taught me that sometimes you just have to hear a fiddle in the band.
Dolly Parton taught me to watch out for Jolene.
Hank Williams Sr. taught me that sometimes it is hard to melt a cold cold heart and free a doubtful mind.
Ernest Tubbs taught me to waltz across Texas.
George Straight taught me to keep an eye out for tears on the jukebox.
Charlie Pride taught me just why I hated pickin' cotton.
Shania Twain taught me to get in touch with my feminine side and feel like a woman.
Clint Black taught me of killin' time.
Bob Wills taught me about faded love.
David Allen Coe taught me the importance of the perfect country and western song. You don't have to call me darlin', darlin'. You never even call me by my name.


:P fuzzbox said...

I have been trying for two days to add a pic to this post but blogger will not cooperate. When it does I will add it.

Green Eyes said...

Fuzz, Blogger and images just haven't been cooperating lately!

Garth has taught me quite a few things, as well:

Did you know that the Thunder Rolls?

Let me tell you, I've got some Friends in Low Places!

Death is waiting for its dance,
Now fate has sentenced us to die.

The storms are raging on the rolling sea
Down the highway of regret
The winds change are blowing wild and free
But you ain't seen nothing like me yet!

OK, I'm done, I could do this all day! Great post, Fuzz!

Anonymous said...

Did you know that tequila makes her clothes come off? Yep. Tequila does indeed do just that.

The Phoenix said...

Fuzz, you might want to have photobucket host your images, and add them that way. It's a good way to add a large image too, since Blogger blocks them.

Rascal Flatts taught me what hurts the most was being so close.

ozymandiaz said...

Country music has tought me that mere sound can make my stomach turn. That and some stuff about beer, crying, my woman left with my truck, dog, and best friend and I miss the dog and truck and yada yada yada...
I already knew about the beer, I don't have a truck or any friends and the dogs belong to her anyhow...

Vic said...

Love it Fuzz! Thanks for the country side. Here's to Good hearted women! AND I know you couldn't say this, but Big and Rich taught me so Save a Horse and Ride a Cowboy. Oh wait, I think I already knew that!

:P fuzzbox said...

green eyes: From a friend in low places, I thank you.

jenna: And dance on the tables.

phoenix: It wouldn't even accept a url pic. Photobucket was no help.

ozy: Country music is not for everyones taste. I listen to it sometimes but most of my country knowledge comes from honky tonks in my single days. If you wanted to meet women, honky tonks were a must in those days.

vic: I glad you liked my equal access post.

angel, jr. said...

This is the very reason I love country music.

Sherri said...

country music has taught me that I don't really like country music.

Mimi said...

You make country sound cool Fuzz!:)

:P fuzzbox said...

angel, jr: Thanks.

sherri: Like I have said it certainly isn't everyones cup of tea.

mimi: I good deal of it is good. But a great deal of it is incomprehensible. Like any musical form you have to sift through some shlock to get to some gems.

starbender said...

fuzz-I know what U mean about blogger and photos! Some days I can't even post until very late in the day.....
AUGH! very frustrating!
This is such a creative country kinda thing!

cleveland said...

country music has taught me if you play the music backwards you get everything back it was rainin the day mom got out of prison so headed to the station in my pickup truck but before i could get to the station she got runed over by a damned old trian good song keep em comin fuzz

siren said...

Great post, Fuzz :)

Jo Dee Messina taught me "that's the way it is..you have to roll with the punches".

Pixie said...

That Jimmy Buffet talks some sense.
I have never really been a fan of country although I will admit to buying Shania Twains "come on over album" but then thats not really that country.

I do like some of Johhny Cashs stuff, and I think his version of Hurt was much better then NIN's

Fuzz next you should post what rock has taught you ;)

tubawench said...

JoDee Messina: Bring on the rain, 'cause tomorrow's another day.

John Michael: Life's a Dance

Pam Tillis: Let that pony run

Garth Brooks: that it is okay, If I ain't goin down til the sun comes up

there are plenty more, but that is all i can think of for now.

Curare_Z said...

County music is full of lessons.

the Dixie Chicks taught me that I need "wide open spaces, "room to make big mistakes."

Of course, they also taught me I should think twice before bashing the president in front of thousands of people.

Anonymous said...

Willie Nelson taught me how to talk to my house... '' Hello Walls ''.
The Dixie Chicks taught me that...I don`t like the Dixie Chicks .
I was Country when Country wasn`t cool.

:P fuzzbox said...

starbender: If I had any hair blogger would have made me pull it out by now.

cleveland: But I never minded standin' in the rain.

siren: Thanks, and thanks for the addition.

pixie: Johnny Cash fit early rolk, country, folk, and gospel genres. He was a man for all people. I did rock last week. I will be doing a series of musical posts covering Texas artists soon.

curare: The lesson that I would like to know from the dixie chicks is how did that air brush artist from rolling stone magazine do such a good job.

:P fuzzbox said...

anonymous: I think that a lot of people have learned that about Natalie and her compadres.

Big D said...

Hank Jr taught me it's a family tradition.

Tuba I heard Michael Montgomery stole that song from his sister and changed the lyrics. The orignal lyrics were:

Lifes a blowjob
you learn as you suck.
Sometimes you spit,
sometimes you swallow.

I think that song would have been way better.

Catch said...

Big D's comment is crackin me up...lololol

I learned from Jimmy Buffet " its 5 oclock somewhere" if I want to have beer with my lunch!

phred said...

I was walkin the line to see blue eyes cryin in the rain, and I fell into a burnin ring of fire.
Now I`m so lonesome I could cry even though I`ve been everywhere man, my heroes have always been cowboys.

April said...

Gotta love what these good ol' country songs say.

I'd forgotten some of these...bring back lots of memories. :)

jane said...

The fact that you can name 25 country singer is astounding. I like this one: Garth Brooks taught me that some of the greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.

Anelize said...

What a clever post. Made me smile, and reminded me why I like listening to this stuff (even though it drives my husband batshit). :)

:P fuzzbox said...

big d: You should a been a cowboy.

catch: Jimmy Buffet is full of wisdom.

phred: And they still are it seems.

april: Thanks, most of my country music knowledge is the old stuff.

jane: They are.

anelize: Thanks, Angry Joyce hates me to sing along with country music as I put a little extra twang to my voice and hick it up as much as possible.

Ol' Lady said...

Great post! There really is only 2 kinds of music - country and western :)
Patsy has me pretty much covered - CRAZY
Merle tells it from the man's side - A Man's Got To Give Up a Lot
Buck tells us how to be - Act Naturally
Glen tells us where he's headed - By the Time I get to Phoenix
Tennessee Ernie tells me how to get home - Take Me Home, Country Roads
And Anne tells me what to do with my hands - Put Your Hand in the Hand
I could go on and on and on and on.....never mind you get the picture :)
I'm a country girl, from the country, living in the country and if Ol'Man wants a divorce all he has to do is move to the city.

Robert said...

I'm just a Coca Cola cowboy
I've got an Eastwood smile, and Robert Redford hair
I'll walk across your heart like it was Texas
And I'll make you scream so loud
You know I really don't care
I really don't care

Thank you very much

Parody: Coca Cola Cowboy, Mel Tillis

jane said...

Hi Fuzz, my friend has made a blog for pictures of hot men that blog. Do you know of any hot men that blog? We're gonna have to comb thru your blogroll & see if any of them are hot. But you can save us time by giving the names up front. :)

oh, and if you're hot, you can tell us that too!

the weirdgirl said...

Jimmy Buffet is considered country? Wow, that's about as close to country as I've gotten then. I always just thought of him as margarita music.

michaelm said...

What do you get when you play a country song backwards?

A: you get your house back, your wife back, your dog back, your car back....

Lyle Lovett taught me that you can be butt ugly and still schtoop Julia Roberts.


Metal Mark said...

I don't listen to counrty music except for when they had guest performers on the Dukes of Hazzard.

:P fuzzbox said...

ol lady: Thanks for the awesome additions.

robert: Thanks for stopping by. I popped in over to one of your sites. All readers interested in country music should give them a read. You do a great job covering the genre.

jane: You would have to ask them individually. I am no seeker of hot men. As for me you would have to ask those that have seen me. But if you search the blogroll. You just might be able to find out for yourself. ;)

weirdgirl: He started out as a country artist but his music crosses a few genres. My favorite Buffet tune is quite country. 'The bear' sings of a still. It doesn't get more country than that.

michael: Just how in the hell that happened is beyond me.

metal mark: At least you know a lot of Waylon then.

Phats said...

Toby Keith is a jackass

Anonymous said...

toby keith is definitely NOT a jackass.. pretty sure he is unreal! and his confidence is sexy. but basically his music is just the best to listen to.. nothin like drivin down the street in the summer with the windows down, blarin toby...