Tuesday, December 20, 2005
A Day Late and A Dollar Short
Being the busy time of the year, I have gotten a little behind on my reading. Yesterday while going through the pile of newspapers beside my chair going through the usual news, I came across an article so profound that it seemed as if choirs of angels had filled the room and sang it's praises. It was an article concerning an invention that would revolutionize happiness.
In San Francisco, Scott Pinizzoto has evolutionized the toilet. The invention, The Swash, is an upscale toilet seat that converts the ordinary toilet into a bidet. And not just a run of the mill bidet for the Swash not only cleanses with warm water but the upscale versions of the Swash features a warming seat, a warm-air dryer, and a REMOTE CONTROL. Retailing for only $429 to $549, it seemed like a steal.
I rushed to tell Angry Joyce that I had found the perfect Christmas gift for her to give me. I outlined the article to her but one look into her now icy blue eyes let me know that my hopes and dreams were to be dashed once more. She stated that she had already gotten me a gift and if I bought this miracle invention the only time anyone else would see the inside of the bathroom would be when I was at work. I will not only not receive this blessing as a gift but there will be hell to pay if I purchase it myself. Perhaps I can stick one of those PayPal donation buttons on my sidebar for donations to "The Fuzzbox Fanny Fur Clean and Fluff Fund."