Thursday, December 08, 2005

Tis The Season


Yes the Christmas season is truly upon us. Angry Joyce has confirmed her first true sighting of Christmas rage. In a shopping center parking lot, she witnessed an irate shopper keying a car while the owner of that car looked on screaming that she couldn't believe this irate person was doing it. The Irate Shopper was screaming back, ' That will teach you to steal my parking space, Bitch!'

It seems that as the shopper with the key was waiting patiently for a car to back out of a parking space and that car was backing up in the direction of the person waiting, another car drove in from the other direction and whipped on in. This prompted the official start of the Christmas rage season here in our humble corner of West Texas.

Merry Christmas to all and to all safe parking.

21 comments:

The Phoenix said...

Tis the season.

The same kind of people were fighting over a gameboy at Walmart the other day. They started pulling each other's hair out, and security pretty much let them beat the crap out of each other until both large ladies got tired.

Smart man.

Ann Alsex said...

Christmas rage is hard because it is too cold to flash or moon people so some people resort to violence.

phred said...

HoHoHo !!
If it`s like that in the parking lot, imagine what`s going on in the store.
Where`s the love ??

Rocky said...

I love these kind of holiday cheer stories. She's probably lucky the other lady didn't key her instead of her car.
Yes, add keying to the other sure signs of Christmas: Lights, trees, decorations and people kicking the shit out of each other for a Cabbage Patch doll.

desert boy said...

nice. it's amazing how selfish some people can be..

:P fuzzbox said...

phoenix: That is one smart employee.

ann: Surely it doesn't get to cold for you to flash anyone.

phred: Evidently it isn't at the shopping mall.

rocky: All the signs are there.

desert boy: Kinda makes you wonder.

Crazy Dan said...

In the word of your daughter "don't hate appreciate"

MrV said...

Watching fat ladies beet the crap out of each other is cool. Spread the holiday cheer Ba humbug my fat hairy nipples

angel, jr. said...

Wow, talked about aggression!

:P fuzzbox said...

c.d.: Just keep singing a happy song.

mrv: Just add green and red jello and a midget and you have one hell of a winter sport.

angel, jr.: It's a dog eat dog season, ain't it?

Naiad said...

You're not an old man, so how would you know? ;)

Shay said...

and that's why I do my shopping early - or online.

:P fuzzbox said...

naiad: I can't help quoting Adam Sandler movies. It is a bad habit of mine. Big Daddy was one of my faves.

shay: That is probably wise.

jane said...

I've actually seen stuff like this happen. I refuse to go to shopping malls during christmas time. the only day i'll go is on a monday morning. thats maybe once during the season.
i can understand the keyer's anger more than the idiot who took her space.

btw, i absolutely love the image below this post.

Laurie said...

Yep, that's why I shop online.

I could see myself being the ass-kicker, not the kickee.

The one time me and a girlfriend went to Toys R Us during the xmas rush, we had a couple of cocktails and a doobie to pre-medicate, then it was all good. If more shoppers did that, everyone would get along just fine..

:P fuzzbox said...

jane: I too feel empathy for the irate shopper. And thanks, I try to help my humble words with good visuals.

laurie: That is my kind of holiday spirit. Or it use to be before age and piss tests conspired against me. Now I have to settle for just the cup of cheer.

Reiki said...

I encountered a bitchy mall shopper yesterday, who parked illegally so close beside me in what was not even a parking spot that I could not fit in between our cars, so I had to get in the other side of the car & drag cranky sick screaming baby across the length of the car to her carseat in the rain.

But instead of keying her car (because there were witnesses), I did something worse...I stuck a baggie of old crackers that 3% had been sucking and drolling all her germs on inside her door handle, so she'd have to touch it to open her car door so after 48 hours of incubation; shopping bitch will have 3%'s nasty illness.

:P fuzzbox said...

dear jane: Leave it to you to come up with such an ingenious and original form of retribution. My hat is off to you.

Laurie said...

Jane, that was really devious and good. I'm staying away from you if the bird flu ever comes to town.. LOL

Tina said...

Tis the season of love....
Please the Holiday season has totally lost its true meaning. More people end up with mental breakdowns, ulcers and such from this season than any other time of the year. Christmas is nothing but a hassle for most. I can't wait till its over.

Especially not looking forward to hitting the malls.

CT said...

thats awesome!!!