Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Christmas Concert for the Damned


Last night was one of those times where I beg for deafness to strike me for a couple of hours. It was the Annual Christmas Concert at the school that my young 'uns attend. This year they had an extra special 'treat' for the parents in attendance. Usually they group all the elementary students together and sing a handful of tunes; sweet and relatively painless. But this year as a little bonus, each class from K-4th grade, climbed on the stage for two songs each in order to solo. Not the good kind of solo, which would be so low that they could not be heard but one or two urchins behind a mike with the opportunity to screech to a captive audience.

One of the highlights of the evening was the 5th grade beginning bands version of ' Poke a Stick into my Ears ' played to the tune of 'Row, Row, Row Your Boat.' The High School Band wasn't half bad though. It helps when you can keep a band director for more than one year and not have the revolving door policy that has plagued the system for awhile. Although one song, 'Jingle Bells and Jungle Drums', brought to mind the SNL skit with Christopher Walkin. The one where he plays a record producer who tells the band, ' I have a fever and there is only one cure. Cow Bells, I have to have more Cow Bells.'

To be fair and honest, I must say that it is important to teach an appreciation of music at an early age. And from the young screechers of today, that I heard last night, may come the next Mozart, Metallica, Snoop Dog, or Faith Hill (Not likely but possible). And my apologies to all those parents who might be offended by my remarks but your kids looked cute. Does that make it better?

13 comments:

Shay said...

"I got a fever and I need more Cowbell!"
the radio station here plays that everytime they play a song that has a cowbell.

Crazy Dan said...

coughmommybloggercough

Rocky said...

Gotta love those Christmas concerts. Jingle Cow Bells. I got a fever to rock around the Christmas tree and the only prescription is more Jingle Cow Bells!

Cissa Fireheart said...

Thank the good lord, I still have one more year before I am subject to listening to "Holiday Concerts" at elementary school....I still vaguely recall my sister's concerts (she's 21 now - scary!) and even as a teenager I cringed....my god....why? why do these schools torture us so?!?!

At least the kids LOOKED cute...;)

:P fuzzbox said...

shay: Sounds like a cool station. But there needs to be more cowbell in r&r.

cd: Better have that cough looked into.

rocky: Watch out rockin' around the Christmas Tree. You wouldn't want to trip and have a jingle ball injury.

laurie: By not wearing earplugs, I am hoping to get my karma right for the upcoming year.

cissa: I think schools do this for forcing them to watch our spawn throughout the school year.

Jay Noel said...

You can never have too much cowbell.

Maybe the school goes through band directors like toilet paper because of ruptered ear drums.

MrV said...

being somewhat of a musician, I get asked to only to attend these horrible events at my daughters school but to actually run them....

they talk about torture used with suspected terrorist... they ought to have those smucks sit through a couple of elementary school CHRISTMAS (very non p.c. to say christmas)concerts.

JM said...

Cowbells sound bad even on cows.

:P fuzzbox said...

phoenix: It would take a certain kind of masochist to be a full time music instructer. I guess not to many people are cut out for it.

mrv: I am sure that after very long of listening to these things, I would even make up stuff to rat people out.

angel jr.: I am sure that they are music to the bulls ears though.

Dear Jane... said...

perhaps some drugs or alcohol beforehand would make it more enjoyable next time?

:P fuzzbox said...

dear jane: It couldn't hurt unless it gave me the church giggles. I am prone to them.

breezy: GEEK! Are you taking the jug or the washboard for the Holiday Hoedown? Just kidding, it's nice to hear from you looking forward to seeing you over the holidays.

ann: Thanks, I guess?

jane said...

That sounds almost as fun as a trip to the dentist's office for a root canal. WITHOUT the novacaine.
My sympathies.

:P fuzzbox said...

Thanks jane but truth be told, I had a fairly decent time actually. I guess that I am a sucker for punishment.