The Thanksgiving leftovers are history so the silly season is officially started. In order to get the ball rolling and to insure that Old Saint Nick doesn't give me the shaft this year. I thought that I would go ahead and make up an early Christmas list. I can assure you that I will update the list as more stuff comes to my mind.
1. A new Tat. I still am undecided as to what to do in order to balance out my arms. I am thinking of a goth mermaid basking under a full moon. But a goth mermaid might just be a bit strange even for me.
2. A new weapon. Living in redneck America with only one handgun, one shotgun, and one rifle, I am woefully under armed.
3. New Neighbors. Although the Thanksgiving entertainment of a drunken free for all next door complete with the punctuation of a ton of gravel being thrown in the air saved me from a mundane quiet Thanksgiving. I suppose I am just never satisfied.
4. A rubber floor. If you have seen the beer commercial with the rubber floor, then you know this is a must have, if you haven't seen it then when you do you will know what I mean. It is too cool for mere words to describe.
5. Peace, love, and happiness for all of humanity or a bootleg copy of the Britney Spears sex tape. Whichever is easier for Santa to fork over.