Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Worse Than The Disease

Commercials for medicines most always weird me out a little bit. They invariably give themselves a glowing report on how they are the best thing since aspirin but at the tail end always give a laundry list of side effects that make me wonder if the cure is worse than the disease.

The one that I notice the most is the new Cialis commercials. Sure it might help give you a stiffy for the next 36 hours but if you start losing your vision or hearing, you better check with a doctor. What's the good in having a good stiffy if you can't see where to put it? I can just imagine some poor guy's wife with some of those flags that are used by sailors on aircraft carriers, guiding the big boy in.

I think with all the side effects if I have a problem in the old e.d. department that I will stick to the tried and true stiffy maker: Porn.


Bruce said...

Let me give you an example of side effects... I'm currently on three different cholesterol meds(Zetia, Crestor, and Welchol) and just recently, my doctor prescribed a fourth one, Niaspan. I've balked at starting this new wonder drug, because the side effects can, among other things, cause flushing(i.e., warmth, redness, itching and/or tingling), which can last 2-4 hours(!), dizziness, tachycardia, palpitations, shortness of breath, sweating, chills, and/or edema, which in rare cases may lead to unconsciousness. Oh, did I tell you that I'm supposed to take this right before I go to bed? Yeah, just what I need, another reason to make it harder for me to get to sleep. I told him last week that I'd start taking it after my colonoscopy this past Monday, but to be honest, I'd rather just go with what I'm taking now and take my chances. Afterall, you can't outrun your genetic makeup.

:P fuzzbox said...

bruce: That's some shitty side effects. AJ is now on Plavix as a blood thinner since her heart attack. I keep waiting for the law to show up at the door because she looks a lot like a beat her on a daily basis. The slightest brush against something seems to cause her to get a hideous bruise.

red said...

Fuzz, stick to porn. Porn is great. Porn is great big fun.

eZ said...

yeah fuzz, porn is good, if that doesn't work I guess huntin and fishin is the next best thing.
I think the scripts for erections are dangerous. what can ya do with a big ol woody if you are dead....nevermind-I forgot your were sick. ;)

Leigh said...

Pharmaceutical commercials are my favorite, they are always good for a giggle. I think my favorite would be the wonder weight loss drug, with the side effects of shitting yourself, not to mention the runny gas. It amazes me that these companies make as money as they do. I guess when you are 500 lbs and can't get it up you will almost try anything.

Hope you are having a great week. Thanks for the giggles.

David Amulet said...

I wonder about those ads. I feel that they would not do that if the FDA didn't require it ... yet some commercials do it in the fine print at the bottom of the ad rather than in spoken caveats. I'm confused.

- david

LisaBinDaCity said...

36 hours? Holy crap, I think I would leave my signficant other after about 6 hours or so ;-)

The Phoenix said...

I hope AJ is doing well. You may want to research oligomeric proanthocyanidins...which is a long scientific word, but they are powerful - and super safe.

They're flavonoids found in grape seed extract. I think there are various pills and supplements you can buy.

They do several things - but one main thing they do is improve blood circulation by strengthening capillary walls.

Scientists are also seeing a major connection between the inflammatory response and heart attacks. Proanthocyanidins also reduce histamine production - which greatly reduces inflammation anywhere.

Porn never hurt either.

Sherri said...

You know, the commercials I hate the most are the Smiling Bob commercials! What are they for.... Levitra I think.

The guy looks like an absolute moron!

Anonymous said...

My favorite is the warning that a side effect of a sleep aide is "may cause drowsiness". I effin hope it does!!

:P fuzzbox said...

red: I couldn't have said it better myself.

ez: Kinda like the old joke about a guy that answered on his quiz that his two hobbies were huntin' and screwin'. When asked what he hunted, he answered,'Somethin' to screw.'

leigh: There is always some new wonder drug for fast weight loss. The truly desperate are often bilked.

david: It always amazes me during radio ads for auto sales how fast those guys can read the fine print.

:P fuzzbox said...

lisa: AJ would have the same problem. I bet my woodie would be broke off and wrapped around my neck.

phoenix: Thanks for the info. I will check up on it.

sherri: Yep, but an awfully happy moron.

sugdaddy: Yep.

ozymandiaz said...

I love the part where they say if you have an erection for longer than four hours see a doctor. If I have an erection for four hours SHE'S gonna need a doctor. HOOYA